Naivety

I can't stop thinking that I have somehow turned myself into somekind of Chen Handong lately...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lan_Yu_(film))

Too Much Time

The biggest problem between me and Cedric is always about time. There's so little time for us to meet, we can only meet around 3-4 times a year. And there's less time to communicate everyday now that Cedric's already working. We barely chat just to ask how our day was and no more than that.
So here comes Steve into the picture.

At first, he's just an acquaintance of mine, no more than that. But lately he's been pushing deeper into my life, more than I want it to be. At first he does no more than daily greeting, wishing me a good day ahead, and those little things you get for someone who barely know. At first I didn't think about him too much, cos in my mind, he's just plain sweet and all. More and more he tries to be involved in my life, and when I ask him whether he has work to do or other things to pass time, he says no.

I mean, where in the world you would want a boyfriend whose job is only thinking about you all day long and nothing else?? He's working as freelancer btw. But isn't it what it means to be a freelancer, to organize your time more wisely so that you can be more productive? And not giving up work just because you are thinking about someone who's not even being closer than an acquaintance.

Don't get me wrong, I'm just playing nice to him thinking that his life is hard enough without me being harsh to him, but this annoys me. Really.

"Hi Chris, busy?"

"Hello Steve, ya kinda, how was your day today?"

"Nothing much, just stay at home, thinking about you all day, missing you." Whuat??

OMG, other guy might find it romantic, but not me definitely. Isn't it getting old after awhile? Or am I being heartless?

Is this just an irony because I want a boyfriend who has more time for me and I have this guy sent to me?

Change

 Ain't it funny how you think
You're gonna be OK
Till you remember things ain't never
Gonna be the same again
The same again

During this past 3 years, a lot of things have changed.
I had been graduated from college. I started working. I had a boyfriend.
I loved my job. I despised my boss. I meet a lot of new people. I traveled around places.
 
But somewhere deep within, I am still the same boy looking for his happiness...

I miss my old days though, memories are still, scattered all around the floor.
How much have I changed? Is it to the better or the worse?

I decide!

Psst!

Yes my dear readers, after been on hiatus for 3 years ++, I have decided to write in my blog back..
Lots of bittersweet memories had been written in the past, and I hope a lot more will be added in upcoming years.
Special acknowledgment for my friend Chan, it's because of him I remember that I still have this blog buried somewhere, and it tickled me to open this blog and read it again.
So here my readers, I'm coming back :-)

谢谢爱 (xiè xiè ài) - Thank You Love

雨下好乱 半个夜晚 你不在身边怎麽晚安
the rain is falling heavily into the middle of the night. I cannot sleep as you’re not by my side

天好蓝 要和你一起看
I want to watch the clear blue sky with you

起风时有你来温暖
You are the one who gives me warmth when a wind blows over

心事简单 一句说完
feelings from my heart are so simple that a simple sentence says all

要我们永远不会分开
wanting us to never seperate

有眼泪 也因为你灿烂
tears are present but they glisten for you

你微笑因为我盛开
Your smile is because of me

要谢谢爱 让你在我身边守护我的未来
I thank love for letting you stay by me and guard my future

有多少美丽奇蹟你手心里全都记载 好期待
how many beautiful miracles, in the palm of your hand is where they are kept

要谢谢爱 让我学会宽容学会体谅关怀
I thank you for letting me learn generosity, respect and care

像阳光陪著大海是平静还是澎湃都是爱
similar to how the sun will accompany the sea, whether it is calm or rough, it is still love

~Garden Sister~

Valentine's day has passed by... today I heard this song again. Suddenly I felt warmth inside which I cannot explain. It's like a reminder that now I've been walking on the same road hand-in-hand with Cedric for 2 years and 7 months. Still early? Or sounds long enough for you?
The last time I met him was May 2009, it's been a long 9 months waiting for both of us, but I still cherish him. I can still remember how we met for the first time, with his timid smile, his shyness, hiss soft kisses...
I love his honesty, I love how he asks my opinion before he makes a decision, I love the way he say "hello" on the phone, I love everything about my Cedric. Not to say, we have our ups and downs, we quarrel a lot. Mostly because I feel him often live in his own world, busy with himself, or just less care for me, but that's just him. In love I need to hold my ego, learn to accept instead of wanting someone to change. Nevertheless, I want this relationship to last forever, want my Cedric to grow old with me. The road is still a long way, but hopefully we can conquer all obstacles and find our happiness, together.

短暂的总是浪漫
The short-termed relationship is always romantic,
漫长总会不满
The long-term relationship is always full of dissatisfaction.