Codename : Stupido

Note: Due to many bloggers request to differ our names, from now on I’d like to call another Chris as STUPIDO (Because he deserves it. He really IS stupid). I hope it will help you understanding my posts better.

I got up this morning, felt so awkward. My throat ache and I didn’t feel too well. I didn’t know why, but I sensed something bad is coming.

I went to my uni at 7 o’clock, and until the time for lunch, nothing happened. So I just thought that the bad augury this morning was a fake. I went lunch wif my best buddy Ed and Ca, one of my girl junior in my uni. We talked a lot, gossiping and teasing at each other. But you know what? This is the start of my misery of the day.

When we were waiting for the meals to come, I teased her about gossip that she’s dating with STUPIDO, and then Ed and I laughed out loud. Part of it was because I knew that it wouldn’t be happen on earth. Gosh, he’s GAY! He wouldn’t get along with girlfriend la. And it sooo not him to do such thing. And then she told me this,

Ca: “Ah, Chris, you’re always late in getting new gossips.”
Me: “What? What? Tell me Ca, are you actually in a relationship?”
Ca: “Yea, since few days ago.”
Me: ”Owh! Really??? Tell me about him~~~. Do I know him?”
Ed: “Ya, tell us, tell us…..How he looks like?”
Ca: “I’m actually dating STUPIDO, hehehe.”
Me: “HA?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!” *Ed and I laughed out loud*
Ed: “Who did have the initiative getting into relationship on the first place?”
Ca: “He did. Aagh, guys! Tell me why did you two laugh so out loud??”
Ed: “Ahaha, it’s really nothing.”
Me: “Lolz, we laughed for another reasons.” *laughed out loud again*
Ca: “Aah, tell me……..Don’t be that annoying.” *sulking*
Me: It really was nothing. Believe me. Eh, why don’t you tell us about your relationship instead?”
Ca: “Actually I didn’t expect this to be happened. I didn’t feel like doing this kind of relationship. It was much better when we still just friends.”

And when our meals were served, I felt queasy. I didn’t feel like to eat anything.

Then after lunch, when Ca was going away, Ed and I discussed about this news. OMG, I couldn’t even believe it. I didn’t even know what to say or what to feel. I dunno I feel either sad because STUPIDO left me, or pity Ca for being a concealer for him without she even realized it. But I’m not furious, I’m not sad. I thought I just a bit shocked. And I tried to figure what’s STUPIDO’s motive in doing this kind of thing.

Is he trying to conceal his gayness? Is he trying to avoid me? Is he…? Is he…? Hundreds questions spinning around, but I couldn’t assured what the correct answers are.

My friend said (thanks to ‘tante’ prince idioth for the counseling session on YM) that STUPIDO just asked me to concern about him more. And that I should give him more attention or what when he comes near me. But I couldn’t get it. Believe me, when STUPIDO gave me attentions, I’d always make sure it was reciprocal. I wouldn’t let it be unrequited. And I don’t think that I’ve made him hesitate about where our relationship goes. We both have been making firm steps, I think, in developing our ‘strange’ relationship (‘strange’ = he doesn’t know I’m gay, I know him, he gave me much attention, I replied him) into something real. If he was asking more attention from me by doing this, well, I can say: it’s a HUGE mistake. By doing this, for me, it means he asked me to leave him. Well, if it necessary, then I’ll do it.

One funny side of this: STUPIDO picks the same girl that I also like. Yea, that wasn’t a typo. I also like Ca, and I would be happy if she be my girlfriend (yah, not as happy as having STUPIDO for my boyfriend though). How could in this misery we still have something in common? SHIT!

Maybe this news affects me more than what I thought. Cos later on, my body temperature rise crazily and I got fever. Also on the way back from my uni early on the evening, I was almost bumped by a car accidentally. My mind sometimes wanders and I got blank several times.

What’s his purpose on doing this?? I really don’t understand.

Really.

Impertinence

As usual, when I visit a new blog I always say “Hi” or whatever on the chatbox so that the blog’s owner know that I visit his/her page.

Not long ago, I came to this blog and try to be polite, say greeting to the owner and say that I like his layout and his blog. I even visit that blog again few days after. At first, I thought the blog owner is so nice. He replied my greeting, visited my blogs, and we did a little ‘basa-basi’ chit-chat on our chatbox back then. He even suggested me to register my blog at a quite well-known GLBT blog directory so that my blog can get more exposure. So sweet of him.

One day after, I visited his blog once more, checked on the chatbox, whether he gave a reply for me again or not, but… my tags have disappeared; while other’s tags (between my tags and his replies to me) kept still.

Positively, I thought that might be just a system-error on the chatbox (a bit uncertain, because I knew that the chatbox provider never had any single error before, but I ignore such thought). I leaved tags once again on his box, trying to communicate with him. Well, he replied, but his answer was quite short and (maybe it’s just my thought) less friendly. Yah, I didn’t give much shit lah. So I, being not too care, left without bad thoughts on him.

About one week later, I visited that blog once more, and once again… had my tags on his chatbox have been removed. I realized that those tags have been removed on purpose. What the f***!! What an arrogant one!

You know, maybe it’s not a big deal actually. Just a few tags being removed from a chatbox. But for me it’s more than that. It’s about mannerism.
By writing this post I don’t mean that I am special or superior or what so that you can’t delete my tags on your board. Not at all. All I want to say is “Is that how that guy treat other people?” with such an impolite manner. Geez, whereas on one of his posts he said that he dislikes such an impolite and flaunting manner. But guess who’ve been nailed for an impolite act?? HIM. Or did he think that I’ve tried to advertise my blog through his? Yuck! nope lah! There’s no need to do that.

You know, maybe I have bad luck with people who have the name *****, just like that blogger have, because I had a quite similar problem before with my ex-gay-senior in my uni who has the same name as his, *****. And the last, with that multilevel marketing guy, also named *****.
Geez, get away from me *****.

Sleep-Over

These few days, my chummy girl friend Ri visiting me from J-town, since she didn’t have something to do to spend his holiday which will end this September 5. During her visit, she will stay at my other girl friend (Ran)’s dorm at Ciumbuleuit.

One thing that I didn’t expect at all: SHE BROUGHT HER BOYFRIEND wif her. And guess what? Her boyfriend, Er, would stay HERE, in my room for few days. Maybe it’s not a big deal for him to stay at my room but only one reason: I suspected that he’s GAY. Gosh! You can imagine la, what would happen if two gay boys share one room… (No need further explanation la).

My friend Id just told me these in our chat session few days ago,

“Be careful lho. Don’t have sex with your friend’s boyfriend.”

“But it’s all right if he’s your girl friend’s boyfriend.”

“Don’t forget, practice safe sex hon.”

OMG, no lah. It wouldn’t happen between us. I’ll never steal someone else’s boyfriend. I believe in karma. If you do something like that, so you should be prepared to get someone to do the same thing to you in return.

But wait, maybe I can make this into some kind of detective game, I’ll proof that he’s actually gay (without attract him sexually, of course, tee hee:-p).

Back to my story, he arrived yesterday, looked somehow ‘yummy’ in that tight shirt.
Owh what was I thinking, bitchy me!

[evidence 1] His apparel’s degree of gayness is high

He unpacked his backpack, and…

[evidence 2] L’oreal and BIOTHERM face care series appeared

What kind of straight guy would use those facial care series on his own will? Hmmm.

This afternoon, we played bowling and then spent all day long browsing on those factory outlets at Haji Juanda Street…

[evidence 3] He shares the same kind of fashion interest with me

Even he chose the exact same pieces of apparel with what I chose. Geez, what’s this? Coincidence?

Also, Ri told me that her boyfriend somehow reminds her of me. He’s kinda melancholic, funny, calm, mature-minded, and care for girls feeling, just like me (no protest lho, it’s all her opinion about me, hehe).

[evidence 4] He’s so sensitive, emotionally-thinking and mellow: a bit girl-minded.

[evidence 5] Tonight, he asked me whether I have a girlfriend or not. Avoiding further conversation about this topic, I said to him that I have this one girl I like, and that we just in intimate-but-without-bonding-between-us kind of relationship.

[evidence 6] He watched “Brokeback Mountain”, while my straight friends abandoned that film, even as our discussion topic.
These last two maybe not strong evidences, but I considered this as part of my judgment.

My conclusion: He’s gay, or at least bisexual.

I might be wrong about this~~

What do you guys think?

Simple Kind of Life

Sometimes, I’m wondering what will my life be ya?
I ever once had this image, that me as a gay will spend my life alone, wandering around without wife, kids, or so so. What a cold life it would be. It was when I regretting my gayness though, lol.
But now it’s different. Now I’m happy and proud that I’m gay. I don’t even want to think what my life could be if I’m straight, ahaha.

I want that once-in-the-future, I marry my right guy (for now I’d like to think that the guy is that bakka* Chris, lolz) and life happily together. Its cliché, I know it already, lol. I know it’s also something that all gays want. But still, it’s my dream =p

We life in this cozy big house, just us (and of course, few maids are necessary). After we got off from our daily routines, we would take bath together, in that spacious bathroom decorated simply with few flowers and pleasant scent. Cuddling each other in the bath tub, I rub the soap along his body, and he responded. Warm water running through our body, jasmine aroma is in the air. Relaxing our minds together, ahhh, what a simple life.

Then we would have dinner together. Enjoying city lights from the balcony together. I caress him before our maids bring us the meal and he holds my hands tight. I kiss him and tell him how much I love him. And then, when the supper’s ready, we eat and do chit-chat about what we experienced today. Communication is a good way to build a successful relationship, you know. My parents told me that.

We would spend our time together after that: maybe going to a gay bar, watching movies, playing computer games, read our favorite books, playing that board-game (errhhh, Snake & Ladder? Scrabble? Ludo?), walking somewhere, of course we do it all together.

Maybe we could have a child or two, who knows? If we’re ready for that, so why not? I kinda like kids (oooow, especially babies), but no naughty ones :-/
Raising our kid(s) together, watch him grow (note that I mention HIM, it means I just want to have son, not daughter) and call us Papa. How sweet isn’t it?
And then after our kid married or what (yah, maybe our kid also gay, who know? Lolx) and all that left is us together, we would live happily ever after =)

*bakka : Japanese term, means ‘idiot’

Love Outing

As we both agreed yesterday (note this: Chris came to my room again yesterday! Just to tell me about our outing. Why didn’t he just call instead? Tee hee) today we will go ‘jalan-jalan’ looking for mp4player we both wanted at electronic centre nearby.

Here’s our conversation on SMS before he arrived,

He: ##Oi Chris, when will you be free today? About our outing… still okay?##

Me: ##Ya, ya I am now free; I don’t have any other class anymore today. So it’s up to you la about the time.##

He: ##Haha, I swam this morning, had no class for today. So when?##

Me: ##How ‘bout now? It depends on your free time. I’m free today. I will stay here all day. I’m waiting ;-) ##

He: ##Okay2, I will take a bath a moment, haha.##

He: ##Okay2, I will take a bath a moment, haha.##

He: ##Okay2, I will take a bath a moment, haha.##

He: ##Okay2, I will take a bath a moment, haha.##

He: ##Okay2, I will take a bath a moment, haha.## *He sent it to me five times*

Me: ##Hey hey, look who’s the rich one, send SMS 5 times at-once, hehehe.##

He: ##Okay2, I will take a bath a moment, haha.## *again*

He: ##Okay2, I will take a bath a moment, haha.## *and again*

Oow, why didn’t he ask me to join him taking a bath? Hahaha~~

He arrived quickly at my room, with his thin PINK t-shirt (Ooooooow, sooooo gaaayyyy, lolz), khaki pants, and black jacket. I dunno why but he seems like wearing that black jacket so much, I often see him with that jacket before. Me myself had the exact same jacket like that but I rarely wear it :-/

He a bit startled when he saw me with my SEDUCTIVE pastel blue shirt on, lolz. You know? The one with a zipper instead of buttons and you can zip it so low thus your chest appeared quite much. Yea, I wore it, hehehe. But he seemed like that kind of shirt though, I knew that he had that kind of clothes also. Kekeke, skanky…

Then we go there by his motorcycle. I sensed that he was a bit nervous from the way he drives. We sat so close and I somehow held him quite tight on that motorcycle, I dunno whether he realized it or not. I treasure my every moment with him. Like in those romantic movies, I’d like the time to stop forever at that moment. Cliché, I know.

We arrived at about 14.00 and while he parked his motorcycle, I took peeks on him, imagining him naked while bathing. Oh, naughty me, kekeke.

Well, we browsing along (while gossiping and chitchat-ing) for the player through that mall; never had him so excited as today before though. But he still as shy as usual, cos I’d always be the one who talks at the shopkeeper, asking for the prices, and comparing each player’s specification. Till the clock showed 16.00 o’clock and finally we found it, TARAAARAA, a cute little black mp4 player we both liked. It was so cheap, couldn’t resist buying it. Ahaha, we are sooo resemble a real couple ya, browsing for something together, buy the exact same mp4player, oooh, what will we do next ya??? Maybe have a dinner together?? I hope, hehe….I thought the shopkeeper also mistook us as a gay couple, therefore she gave us that ‘special price’ for those mp4players. Well, couldn’t blame her, though :-p

On our way home, we passed at this ice cream stall we both never tried before, and then he asked me whether I’ve tried ice creams there or not. Wooo, what is this? Do you think what I think? Then I told him that I’ve never tried ice-cream there and maybe some time we could try come by to the stall and eat some ice cream together*tee hee, happy me*.

Back To Dorm

I just arrived back from J-town to my dorm. Ah, should take a bath and doing ‘beres-beres’ a bit, my room a bit ‘chaotic’, hehehe.

Finally after so long at J-town, I will be able to watch those gay porns again, kekeke. Yah, you know lah, can’t watch such movies at J-town so I just left it all in my dorm. Okay, cu later, I will take a bath before dinner…

*unbuttoning my shirt*

*unzipping my pants*

*opening my underwear*

Awwww, I’m naked now. Ahaha, skanky skanky.

Chilling Sensation

Sometimes, I and my Ma will go for a simple walk after we had our dinner. It will be just the two of us, while we do simple talks, exchange gossips, or whatever happened around us. It isn’t different last night. But not as usual, we decided to change or usual route a bit. Then we planned to pass over the deserted playground nearby.
The wind was strong thus the night was so cold. We walked along together and crossed the river’s bridge near our house, toward that deserted playground I mentioned earlier.

As we thought, that playground is kinda dark and a bit creepy, with its dense banyan trees (a.k.a. ‘beringin’ trees) canopy. The shades of the trees blown by the wind added the creepiness there.
Even when the playground has been deserted, the swings and the see-saws there were still in good shape. The playground has 2 swings which were placed side-to-side.
When we saw the swing…..Gosh! One of the swings was swung without anyone pushing it! At first, we thought that was just the wind, but after we saw it more precisely, the other swing didn’t move at all. And when the wind stopped blowing for quite long, the swing’s movement was still steady as if disembodied force pushed it perpetually. OMG, it gave me chilling sensation on my whole body when I saw it.
I knew it before, that on that playground, there were many ghostly appearances. But still, it chills me to saw one of them myself. When I asked my Ma, she answered that there, near that playground, there this woman who was killed and his body was buried nearby. So her angered spirit has been wandering around that place until now. Whuiiiii.
And I noticed after, there was this couple on the bench under one of the banyan trees, ‘asyik-masyuk’ flirting and hugging, didn’t notice the ghostly swing at all. Yah, we (my Ma and I) didn’t feel afraid, walking close to that playground and pretended as if we didn’t see anything. Then we walked home while talking about it~~

Ahaha, don’t you think that the way I write this post kinda resemble those horror novels a bit? Kekekeke. But this story is true lho, I experienced it myself. Wah, maybe I should rethink a side career path as a horror writer, lolz ;-)

Mini Bamboo Bonsai

Anyway, I had a chit chat with my Ma today. I told her that I get bored in my dorm, cos there’s nothing to do there. Playing computer games, or surfing on the net (which I usually do) is not much of a help. So I planned to buy a pet, maybe a cute hamster, a tarantula, a cute lil’ snake, or a turtle. But my Ma said,

“Eeeek NO, I won’t let you raise those things. You know the reasons. End of discussion.”

Anyway, I listed the reasons why my Ma never let me have a pet:

1. Hamster: It’s SMELLY. Beside, it needs continuous attention. You must replace its dunno-what-it-should-be-called wood flakes everyday. What a bacteria’s habitat it is.
2. Tarantula: What?????!!! You’re going to have tarantula?? Think if it loose from the aquarium! That would be a big problem!
3. Mini snake: ….*silent*
4. Dog: You CAN’T have a dog in a dorm. Even if it’s a cute little Chihuahua like Paris Hilton’s.
5. Fish: You’ll end up neglecting your fish. And in a long holiday, who will give’em food?
6. Cat: Its fur spread around. And it generates toxoplasmic disease. (Yah, I hate cats myself, so of course I won’t pick them as my pet).
7. Turtle: It gives you bad luck to raise turtle. Your life will progress as slow as turtle if you raise them.

Yah, after all those, nothing left from me. I’m giving up on having a pet. My lil’ brother suggested me to assembling those miniature kits or puzzles instead. But I just like assembling, not keeping them. All I usually do after I assemble them is throwing them cos I don’t have enough space in my dorm to keep them. The same goes with puzzles. After I have it completed I dunno what to do next.

And then suddenly my Ma came, giving me this mini-Bamboo bonsai and tell me to keep them as my pet.
“It doesn’t give you too much problem to deal with, does it?” my Ma said.

This is said to be “Lucky Bamboo Bonsai” which gives the owner prosperity and luck. I thanked my Ma for giving me this bonsai. It’s cute, doesn’t need too much attention, yet keep me accompanied in my dorm well. I’ll wait for it to bloom (yes, it really can bloom) and spread its life scent for me. Haha, naïve me.

My Hateful Cousin

Every family sure has its own problems. My family is not an exception. Even if you read my blog and think my family as a trouble-free one, happily living together and so, but the truth isn’t that sweet.
In fact, except my Pa, Ma, and my brothers, I don’t really know whether I can call them family or not.

One of the cases….
Few days ago, my cousin D came to my house at 2:00 in the MORNING. As I thought, he was drunk. Taking somebody’s car with him and asked my Ma to give him money. Not for the first time. You know, it wouldn’t be much problem if he could use that money wisely. But as usual, he spends all the money to gamble here and there, throwing them all uselessly. That night, my Pa insisted him to sleep-over at my house, rather than driving home drunk and get an accident or what.
Why should he become such a burden? It’s my question that remains unanswered. Can’t he even think that it’s not easy to earn money? He keep asking and asking money from us as if we have a money tree.
My Pa and Ma are way too soft on him I think. They would usually give him what he wanted and let this hateful circle repeated back. My Pa forbid me for hating my cousin, even it’s so hard to do so. My Pa said, even he is so shameless and become such a burden, he is still a part of our family that we couldn’t escape. Gosh, but still, I feel uneasy on my cousin no matter what.

Not just my cousin, I do have many more stories that I even can’t write them all here cos it’s too embarrassing and would bring our disgraces out open.

I don’t want to whimper or sigh, but it can’t be helped. I feel sorry for you to read this on my blog, but that’s who I am. Please give me power to move forward and face it.

Back Home

There’s something special these few days, so I just don’t have something I want to blog about *sorry sorry*. The school term isn’t even started; therefore I don’t really have something to do and something to tell about.

My bad dreams few days back perhaps a sign that I must go home to J-town, meet my family, erasing every single odd thoughts in my mind.

Lolz, maybe for you it is way too lame. But that’s me; I’m really a family man, though. I must see my family much often. If I got far away from my family, eventually my mind will wander, imagining how lonely I am, why I should be lonely like this while my family is happy together at home, and so so. Such a drama queen (that’s one reason I created this blog back then, so I could write down my feelings instead of being a melancholic drama queen). Haha, so that’s why tomorrow I’m heading back to J-town, meet my family before the school term starts.

Anyway, I got a funny short message from my friend H, I dunno whether you have read this one or not. So I just tag you all, who read this post, to resent this message to your friends, haha x-)

Life is just like PENIS. Sometimes it gets BIG, sometimes it gets small. Sometimes IN, sometimes OUT. Sometimes soft, sometimes HARD. Sometimes UP, sometimes DOWN. So enjoy PENIS! Oooops… I mean life ^^

I hope I meet Chris there, since our home is not too far separated, hehehehe *just hoping*. So be back for more posts next Monday guys. CU then ;-)

Postponed Outing and a Strange Dream

Yesterday I used to go with Chris to buy that mp3player we wanted to buy. (Is it a coincidence that we both just want to buy an mp3player at the same time? Even we wanted to buy the same type mp3player. Whoa, what a mind contact, lolz.). But since he had to go to J-town to attend his friend’s graduation ceremony, we postponed our outing. Yah, I think there’s no rush lah, it’s okay.

Anyway, I had this weird dream in my sleep,

I AM MARRIED. Gosh. To be detail, I am MARRIED WITH A GIRL!!! Accckkkkk nooo!! I am married with Lie, one of my gal friends in uni. Then we have a kid, yes a kid, owh. It was so real, till I thought I wasn’t dreaming. In this dream, I could even think about many things that actually happen in real life. Now I’m a little scared. *tremble tremble*

How this could possibly happened? I mean, yes, if I am going to marry a girl in my real life, I probably will choose Lie as my bride (which I doubt I will do, since I’m not too into women anymore). But it’s not about that. What I’m thinking is: Do I still have a hidden desire to marry a woman? Now that I’ve realized that I prefer man to woman.

Geez, I really haven’t completely comprehended myself yet. I realized it.

My Lunch with Chris

Yesterday afternoon, suddenly Chris appeared in my room while I was waiting to meet my academic advisor (shit, he always late every time-->refers to my advisor, not Chris). Whoa, he asked me for lunch today *happy happy*

So we went to Maranatha, to have some ‘nasi bakmoy’ and ‘bakut sayur asin’. Duh, the sun was so strong; it’s so hot out there. But when Chris by my side, everything was so cool, lolz.

We sat there with our ‘nasi bakmoy’ separating us. He sat in front of me, and we did have sweet conversations, ah, everything was so blur blur till I couldn’t even remember what our sayings were, hehehehe. When we were eating, I looked straight in his eyes, and he replied. And then we just smiled, and wander somewhere else, too ashamed to admit that we were looking at each other. Then we would continued chat, and started to looking at each other again, lol.

One thing I regret that time: He didn’t even know that I knew that he’s also gay, just like I am. (Don’t get flustered with my sentence ya)

I have been wishing that somehow, some time, somewhere, he would understand that I had feeling for him. I’m such a coward to not dare saying such things to him. Even if I have determined to do so, but still, it wasn’t enough. I don’t want to wait any more, cos it will bring more pain. But even if I tell him, I can’t bear to lose him if he denies it.

So that afternoon passed just that, nothing happened. But I’m sure, some time in the future, there will be a good chance for me.

Lust Frenzy

Well, this post is dedicated to my friend Tim, who tagged me to write about “What Straight People Misunderstood about Gays”

Because of some reasons, I remember one of friends of mine once told me here.

“You gays usually attracted just physically.”

“All that matters is just lust!”

Then I think, “Are we?”

Well, yea I must admit there are many cases that gay couples just hold out for not so long, perhaps because getting bored with his playboy bf or so many narrow reasons. So many people even said that a relationship between to male won’t last long because there is always a strong tendency to have pria idaman lain. Yes indeed, I admit it. But isn’t it too early to say that gays just care for lust?

Me for instance: sometimes (okay, maybe not just sometimes) I myself want to have a hunkylicious-gorgeous guy; that guy who plays as Superman (dunno who his name is, duh) or that Jake Gyllenhaal from the Brokeback Mountain as my date. I mean, who doesn’t?? Of course you prefer your mate for at-least good looking la. But that’s not all for me. Beside that, I would always see his other qualities, his way of behaving, how he treats others, and so many more (lolz, maybe that’s why I hardly get a boyfriend, being too picky, kekeke). So he couldn’t say that I only care about lust actually.

So that’s why I just hate those cheesy-brained people from IRC who always think physical properties is the most important for us, or think dat they’re the most gorgeous human being on this planet. Always fly away when they don’t feel like your appearance whereas they even worse. No offense here by the way.

Some guys (well, many guys actually) really do have misunderstanding about us gays (lesbian and bisexual as well). We gays do have feelings. We can love, we can sad, we can happy, just like what you do. Helooo, even dolphin or dog as animals do feels. Why aren’t we?
We are same human being. The difference is that we prefer the same-sex relationship. That’s all.

Annoying Habit

Lately that H guy I met not so long ago started this annoying habit: call me for a sec but when I try to answer it he would always close the line a.k.a. misscall. You must know it la. It is really annoying therefore I usually keep my mobile phone in silent mode nowadays. Maybe part of it was also my fault; at first I replied his misscalls, just trying to be decorous. But now that he misscalls me everyday (few times a day, arrgghh) it seems soooo annoying. Once I told him to stop, but it wasn’t work.

Today I met Ed, and I told him about this H’s annoying habit and guess what Ed said,

Usually when a guy misscalls you, he is thinking about you

Aackk, nooo, I don’t want him to thinking of me. I do like him, but just as friend, no else. Did I give him any hope last time we met? I don’t think so. Even if yes, it was just first meeting la. For me, first meeting just needed to give me a first impression about the guy I meet, no more. How he behave, his appearance (well, who doesn’t?), and so so. I didn’t even count it as a date :-/

Awh, why did many guys I knew have this weird habit sih? First that D guy, now this H guy. For them to know me better, having this weird habit is a total turn-off for me.

Anata Anata Anata

I couldn’t stand my long hair, it’s so annoying. So I went to Anata today to get my hair cut. Ah, I saw today that seductive pedicure guy was absent, lol. It’s not like I was searching for him in purpose though=p

Yah, I told my stylist (I dunno what to call this profession, cos in Indo we usually call it “tukang potong rambut”, kekeke) to cut my hair short. I want to have spiky hair style, bored liao with that long Asian hairstyle he used to cut my hair. But beyond my expectation, he cut my hair TOO much thus I look like a bit bald. It also makes my face looks somewhat chubby (hate hate hate it). Gosh, what will Chris say about my new hair style?

What Is This?

Geez, never thought it would be happen. This morning, while I was working on my computer in my uni, suddenly that bakka Chris approached me. Guess what? He just wanted to ask me to go browsing that mp3player he wanted (see my last post) next Sunday. He went this far from his dorm just wanted to tell me that. Why didn’t he just call or maybe send me a short message instead…? Is this a good sign?

Too Fast Encounter

The First Encounter
Finally after so long no see, I have another chance to see my Chris. There I was, at my uni talking with my juniors and then he came approached.
Gosh, he’s a bit skinnier. Didn’t he eat well at home? Ah, nevertheless, for me he’s still adequate. My feeling is so strong for him thus I wanted to hug him tight and squeeze him right there. Awh. I missed him a lot. He wore that white trousers with matching white shirt, covered in some thin light-brown jacket. It seemed he quite like that outfit coz I’ve seen him in that before though. Then I said,
“Halo Chris.”
“Ah, halo Chris,” he smiled and replied with his unadorned voice.
“…” *smiled, trying to make conversation*
“How are you?”
“I’m fine. It’s really nice to see you around…”
Then one of my friend interrupted the moment and when I glanced back, he was going with his friend. Shit.

The Second Encounter
In the evening, one of my junior, Ca asked me to go with her. She told me she wants to see the cookies exhibition at Cihampelas Walk, where so-she-said you can try all the cookies for only Rp 15000. So cheap. But, like other all-you-can-eat place, it was too crowded for us to move freely and try the cookies, besides almost half of the cookies was made of chocolate (which we don’t really like=p). So we just decided to try he ramen at the new restaurant named Shin Men instead. It is a newly opened premium Japanese Restaurant there. So we go there: me, Ca, Liem, Jay, Hen, and Vy.

To my surprise, there at the Cihampelas, Chris joined us. Apparently (I knew it later) Ca has asked him to go along too. So surprise, but happy. Anyway, it’s not like Ca knows that I love Chris lo~~ It’s just coincidence that she asked Chris to join us.

I choose Miso Spicy Ramen and strawberry juice. The ramen was quite bad (but still MAHAL!! Shit). But because of Chris’ presence it wasn’t that bad, lolx. I saw he just ordered the bento packet and strawberry float. The bento is so small I think. Geez, no wonder he’s getting skinnier. So we just ate and chit-chat for a while there.
Yah, the whole thing costs us Rp 189.000. Can’t say it worth the price. Bad, bad restaurant, I won’t eat there again next time.

Then we walked around the mall. I and Chris would just walk slowly behind the group, talking about stuff like: what happened recently, his pimples, and so so. He walked so close to me, till I can barely felt his breath against me sometimes. Here I write some of our conversations.
“Look like you’re getting skinnier during this holiday.”
“Ah, really? I don’t realize it.” *smile*
Hen interrupted (talking to me), “You’re also a bit skinny lo Chris.”
”Ya, it’s kinda hard for me to gain weight, it’s easier for me to reduce weight, which I needn’t to do, cos I don’t want to be freaking skinny hehe”
Bla bla bla bla……………………………..
“Eh, wait a sec, my facial wash gel is emptied out. I should buy a new tube.”
“What facial foam do you use?”
“The L’oreal one, you know? Pure Zone.”
“Ow, is that good?”
”Yes, that’s a good one. What do you use yourself?”
“I use the one from skin centre.” Which I realized is necessary, because he does have a acne prob.
Bla bla bla bla………………………………

And in the end, Chris asked me if he wants to buy a new mp3 player, what brand he should consider. He asked me because he knew I’m so into that techie stuff. And I told him that I also want to buy a new one. Then he suggested we go together to choose at the shop. Cos, like he said, he doesn’t know much about techie stuff, and it’s better for him if I accompany him there. Of course I’m glad he trusts me, and I hope this would develop further. I hope so.

We went back home after that. And I’m looking forward to see him again.
Haisss, see what the impact of seeing him today, I lost interest in doing anything but thinking of him, sigh.

Nadine, Our Lovely Miss Indonesia

People are getting more cruel, stupid, and narrow-minded…

It has been a big fuss lately that Nadine Chandrawinata, Miss Indonesia is going to Miss Universe contest. It has been a national issue now. About either those people who don’t want her to go, his English-language-accident, or those who now suing her for so-they-said “Demoralizing Indonesian people”.

[Nadine Chandrawinata]

I’m not going to insult here even more here. Now I just want to give my support for her. You know, no offense, it’s truly not her fault for not having such a huge brain or perfect communication skill. We do have imperfections, we really do. And now I’m here to highlighting those people who abusing her. It doesn’t mean that I’m such a mistakes-free guy either.

1. Ones who laughed at her because of her poor English
I’ve read it in one of an Indonesian blog (sorry I don’t give you the url here) that he (refers to the owner of the blog) laughed out loud at her, wrote her interview in his blog, even highlighted the wrong words she made and gave it such rude comments.

Honey, you know what? His English is also not that good, actually. I’ve found many mistakes in his grammar, and he just didn’t highlight few more wrong sentences Nadine made. What a pity, he laughed at Nadine’s grammar while he has two mistakes in him just needed to be fixed soon. One, his grammar. And two, his mind. Word.

2. Ones who said that she’s demoralizing Indonesian people.
What is it? Can it really be demoralizing a country just because you put a contestant in a beauty pageant? Oh Gosh! My conclusion: Those people are so STUPID!!! With capital S-T-U-P-I-D and many exclamations.

3. Ones who said that she’s not smart enough to compete.
Well yes, you do have a point. I’m speechless.

4. Ones who suing her because of her poses in a bikini suit.
Are you insane???! She was there to represent our country. And you now are suing her just because he wore a bikini suit? Well helloooo, every woman in that pageant wore the same kind of suit too. And nobody even make it such a big deal. Geeeezzzzz, apparently ‘sane’ is not in some people’s lexicon.

Well, can’t you all see this, if Nadine compete in that Miss Universe contest, other countries can recognize Indonesia even more? Even if she was wrong such as referring Indonesia as a city, isn’t that just make one more Indonesian image patched clearly in others mind. Let me give you an example: Like, a friend of mine from America was watching that show and say,

“Oww, that Miss Indonesia is so bad. How could she….bla bla*continues*”

See? Now he just remembers Indonesia (Even if it’s not in a good way, lolx).

Can’t you see it that way, people? Geez, don’t be that narrow la.

Those craps =/